A guy walks in to the restaurant where he frequently eats and sits at
    his regular table.  The regular waiter comes over and the customer asks
    for the specials.  The waiter flips his little order pad over and reads
    the specials from the back.

    "That's new, Harry, usually you have to go over to the blackboard and
    read the specials.  But now you have them on your pad."

    "Well, the boss hired an efficiency expert who determined that we were
    spending too much time going to the blackboard, so now we have the
    specials on our pads."

    A few days later the customer is back and he notices that Harry has a
    spoon in his pocket.

    "Hey, Harry, what's with the spoon in your packet?"

    "The efficiency expert determined that the most often dropped utensil
    is a spoon, so now we all carry spoons to avoid unnecessary trips to
    the bus station."

    The next time in the restaurant, the guy notices that Harry has a piece
    of string coming out of his fly.

    "Um, Harry, I hope this isn't too personal a question, but why do you 
    have a string coming out of your fly?"

    "You remember that efficiency expert?  Well, he found that we were
    spending a lot of time washing our hands after we pee.  So now we
    have this string to pull our dicks out of our pants.  That we we
    never soil our hands and therefore don't have to wash our hands."

    The customer thinks about this for a moment and asks "how do you
    put your dick back into your pants?"

    "I don't know about everyone else, but I use that spoon I carry."